I’ve Been Avoiding You

Hi, everyone! I hope that life has been treating you all well lately.

I’ve been avoiding posting since surgery. My body is used to Hydrocodone, but the Oxycodone they prescribe after surgery packs more of a punch. It knocks me on my butt and makes me pretty dopey. I’m trying to type this before my pill kicks in and I no longer make sense. Perhaps it’s best to have the hubby proofread before publishing.

I was told that surgery went smoothly, just a little bit of scar tissue to work around while placing the leads. I was home by early evening and enjoying a delicious sandwich. The first day home, I actually wasn’t feeling too bad. I think that was thanks to the pain meds from the surgery center still galloping through my veins.

The following days were much more painful. It hurt to do anything. Now that I’m a week and two days out, the pain is letting up; not enough to be off the pain killers just yet or drive, though.

I had my post op visit with the physician assistant yesterday and she said the incisions looked like they were healing well. That appointment wasn’t all rainbows and sprinkles though. I’ve been having my psychogenic movement attacks (I’ve mentioned these briefly before) this week, and during my appointment, I had a big attack. My body tensed up and jerked so hard that I was in tears. My legs gave out and I nearly fell, catching myself on the chair. I felt so embarrassed. My husband and the PA both assured me I shouldn’t be embarrassed, and my hubby tried his best to get me to focus, calm my breathing, and relax. I guess in a way, these are like major panic attacks. Whatever they are, they leave me feeling drained afterwards.

I get my device turned on tomorrow, and will do my best to post so you all can see what I’m talking about. For now, here’s a few little tidbits:

  • There are two incisions – one on the thoracic spine, where they did a laminectomy to attach the leads. The other is in the upper portion of my left butt cheek, where the battery now lives.
  • Both incisions are about 2 inches long.
  • I need to be careful about bending and twisting, and should not lift anything over 10 pounds.
  • My emotions are scattered all over the place, but I definitely do NOT regret doing this.
  • I’m looking forward to being healed up and feeling more human.

Until tomorrow, my friends. Thanks for all your support.

With love,

J♡

Now Taking Appointments (Procedure Day)

Do you have fuzzy television reception? Are your radio stations not coming in crystal clear? Book now! Just place J♡ next to your electronic device and receive the reception you deserve! All for the low, low price of “just kidding”!

Today was procedure day and although it was not mentioned, I am curious if the wire leads in my back will improve reception and/or WiFi signal. To the best of my knowledge, the procedure went smoothly. I had the IV placed in my hand and was sent back to the waiting room until the device rep arrived. Once he did, I was brought back in to discuss what type of pain relief we were looking to achieve and what to expect over the next week. I’m not allowed to shower; only sponge bathe the essentials. It’s 111 degrees here…I really didn’t think this through. The rep told me that once the leads were placed, they would wake me up a bit so he could ask if the signals were reaching where they were needed. He told me I probably wouldn’t remember that part. He was right.

In the procedure room, they had me climb up on the table and onto my belly. They said because I’m tiny, they had to pile pillows for me lie on. Two people squishing down these pillows so I could climb up…I found this rather amusing. I was told when the medication would go into my IV to relax me. I was worried they might stick me before I fell asleep, so I kept tapping my fingers to the music so they would know I was still awake. I felt more medicine run through my veins and felt very warm. Next thing I know, I’m climbing off the table and into a wheelchair. It felt like everything only took a few seconds, but I guess the procedure actually took about 30 minutes. The device rep talked to me once again and gave me the controller for my device. They gave me a juice pouch, removed my IV, and sent me on my merry way.

The last couple of days, my left leg had been in so much pain I could not get comfortable. I’m happy to report that it does feel much better already. My back on the other hand, hurts something awful. I was told I would be sore for the first few days probably. The device rep will check in with me by phone several times this week. Those will be the only times I should use my controller if necessary.

The lumpy looking spot on the left is the external battery.
Ooooh my very own controller.

Well I’m a bit tuckered out and a nap sounds pretty good right now. I will try my best to update with how things are going day to day. Thanks for all the love and support!

With love,

J♡

Good News and Bad News

Hi friends. I have some good news and some bad news. Which do you want first? Ok, we’ll go with bad news.

I woke up to a phone call today. I looked at the caller ID. It was from my pain clinic where my procedure is scheduled. I assumed it would be the the typical recording that always mispronounces words, reminding me of my appointment. Nope, it was a real person letting me know the doctor recommended I reschedule my appointment until next week. She said it was up to me, but if I kept my original appointment, they would not be able to give me the stronger sedation. Mind you, I was only partially awake and you know how anxious I’ve been for this, so I agreed to go with the lesser sedation and keep my appointment. After waking up my husband to get his opinion, and chewing on it for a minute, I decided to call and change the procedure day. When I called the office back, I found out that the reason for the change was because the woman who administers the sedative had a family emergency and had to call out. I have to admit that I was a little more than bummed out. Pain relief was so close, but maybe this was a sign. So instead of sulking, I will look at the positives and pray for the woman and her family. I only have to wait one more week. The new date is set for late morning on July 2nd.

Now the good news…☺

Because the plans changed, my husband and I decided to meet up with the kids and my in-laws on vacation. The best part? The kids had no idea we were coming, and their excitement when they saw us was priceless! It made my heart feel all mushy. Now we can all soak up the cool air and sand beneath our toes as a family. As a bonus, this will definitely help the time go by faster until next Tuesday.

Thank you all, for your well-wishes and support up to this point. ❤

With love,

J♡

I’ve Been Slacking – Update Time

Oops! I didn’t realize I let so many days pass without posting. So let’s see, what has been going on around here?

Well, there’s this…

Soooo close to THE day! I’m down to my last pain killer. Actually, a quarter of a pain killer, which in a way is a good thing. No pain pill means that pain will really build up, and while I’m not thrilled about that, it will allow me to really see just how well this scs device works. Yesterday was a bad pain day, today was worse, and I’ll have to wait and see what tomorrow brings. I can only hope and pray that it plays nice. I am contemplating doing some YouTube videos during my trial to give updates. Maybe it would help others who are considering or about to go through this procedure. I’m not one for public speaking though and that is close enough to it. Plus, I’ve never liked the sound of my own voice on video or phone, ha. I’ll let you know what I decide.

The kids have been gone since Friday night. They are now on vacation with their grandparents, soaking up beautiful weather and ocean waves. Here’s the purse (finished) that I made for my daughter.

She absolutely loved it! Then again, that girl would be thrilled to receive a crayon drawn heart on a piece of paper.

I did also make that backpack I talked about, for my son. He liked it, but his response of cool, thanks, is more his personality.

A pocket on the inside for smaller things:

Maybe he’ll use it, maybe not, but at least he has it just in case. Either way, I had fun with these projects.

It’s been a little strange not having the kids home, but kind of nice. Do I miss them? Heck yeah! Am I also enjoying the calm in the house? Oh yeah! Any parent that says they can’t stand to be away from their kid, is either a brand new parent or from a different planet. I’m teasing. It is nice though, to have some downtime and take care of me for a bit. Speaking of which, my sweet husband told me yesterday that I should go and get my hair cut if I wanted and buy a box of color if I like. I did, and it felt wonderful! I’m working on growing my hair out, but it was close to mullet status…no thanks! A quick cut had me feeling much better already. I picked out a deep red color and dyed it at home. Add a little makeup and I felt genuinely happy and girly. When you’re in pain and such, a lot of days are filled with messy hair and pajamas. So even though I didn’t have plans, just getting a fresh look made me feel more human. Does that make sense?

I suppose that is all for now. Hugs to whoever may need one. Wishing you all a great day/night.

With love,

J♡

Another Arts and Crafts Day

Our daughter has been a little apprehensive about going on vacation without us. She says she’ll miss us too much. I want her to go and have a great time. She’ll be able to swim, make sandcastles, and spend quality time with her grandparents. I thought that maybe making her a purse to take on vacation would help. I headed over to my mom’s house today, to spend some mom and daughter time, and paint the jean purse I made. It’s not done yet, but I think she’s going to like it!

See that iced coffee? That’s crafting fuel. Yummy!

Now, I just need to figure out something to make our son to take on vacation. I’m thinking a drawstring backpack. We’ll see.

And then there’s this quick little craft: one of those countdown paper chains.

I made it because I’m anxious for the procedure, but also because my inner child still likes playing with paper and glue. Who am I to argue?

Wishing you all a great night/day.

With love,

J♡

Some Happy News for Me

I haven’t been very good with my posts this week; I’m sorry. It is partially because I’ve been busy. If I’m being honest…it was partially because I was pouting.

Tuesday was the day I was supposed to receive a phone call with an update about insurance approval and scheduling of the spinal cord stimulator trial. I waited, but no call. I don’t like to be a pest, so I decided I would wait until Wednesday and call them in the afternoon. Then I decided, no, I’ll wait until Thursday; that’ll be one week from the last conversation with the coordinator.

Well, I waited with my phone all day yesterday, like a teenage girl waiting for her crush to call on the landline. Nothing. I waited until about 10 this morning and gave a call. Answering machine…damnit. I left my voice message and true to my nature, apologized for pestering her. She called me back about an hour later, and guess what?! Insurance gave the approval and I am now scheduled!!! I will have the procedure done on the 25th and then have the leads removed on July 2nd. I cannot begin to tell you how excited I am for this! I have confidence that this is going to work, and that I’ll be able to get the permanent implant after, and life will be better.

There is a downfall to my good news though. It just so happens to be scheduled during the week we were supposed to go on vacation. The kids will still be able to go with their grandparents. I told my husband he should go and have a great time. He declined and is choosing to stay here with me. How sweet is that? I’m beyond blessed to have his love and support, even though I know this procedure terrifies him.

That’s all for now. I hope you all have something in your day that makes you smile. Take care.

With love,

J♡