Where is the Support?

I need to get something off my chest. For years, I thought about starting a blog, but I was nervous to share a side of me that most people didn’t know about. I came into this with low expectations, thinking that what I had to share probably wouldn’t be worth reading. All of you lovely fellow bloggers quickly turned my thinking around, with the love and support you’ve shown through following, liking and commenting on my posts.

I decided to share my posts with family and friends on social media, and was left feeling discouraged. With the exception of a few people, the support is not there. The stats show me that sometimes the link I share is clicked, but there is no like button clicked, no comment…nothing.

So the worrier in me starts to wonder, is it that people don’t want to take the time to click and read my posts (I think every post so far has been a 2 minute read or less)? Is the content I write not good? Do they prefer to pretend that this side of me does not exist? Maybe it’s me they don’t like; perhaps it’s a personal thing and I’m not worth their time?

I’ve let this bother me quite a bit, but I’m starting to shift my thinking. I’ve always been that person who worries what everyone thinks. Why? It only makes me miserable and so I’m trying to change this. I have to remind myself that I didn’t start this blog for them. I did this for myself and in the hopes that maybe I could help someone feel less alone in their struggles, by sharing my own. No more feeling discouraged. I’m going to continue writing because it is something I love. I’ve seen an emotional improvement in myself in the short four months since joining WordPress. I’m not going to give that up.

Thank you all for your amazing support.

What keeps you going when you start to feel discouraged?

With love,

J♡


Image: Pixabay

38 thoughts on “Where is the Support?

  1. I completely understand you. But I’d say the perspective you’ve adopted is the right one. Do it because you like it, because writing is your passion, and then let people join you in that. And most of all, just keep writing 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Hi J.

    Don’t be discouraged. What you describe is a feature of online activity I think. The social media factor is unfortunately one that can often be about ‘likes’ and ‘follows’ rather than sincere engagement. Not for all people obviously. It’s easy to feel snubbed or offended online as a result. And I’ve felt the same myself and I’m sure most of us have. My conclusion is just to write what I believe in and let people do what they do – some will engage in a meaningful way, and others won’t.

    Hope you and your family are doing well.

    Take care, Stephen

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks Stephen. I guess I was just hoping that they would see that it was something important to me and show the same kind of support they hope for when they post something they are passionate about. If that makes sense?
      I hope you and yours are doing well also!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. My family seldom reads my blog… ever. My youngest boy will read excerpts if I post them on my Facebook page and even repost them from time to time. Few of my friends even read it.

    And yet, they are my family and friends… so I can’t really take it personally. So, I separate myself from my blog. Rejecting my blog is NOT rejecting me.

    BTW PLEASE don’t reject my blog… the grief would KILL me…

    Liked by 3 people

  4. FaceBook is a tough media to share on. I used to. People want to click like or use an emoji. I eventually made a separate page for my blog post, and for the people who want to read my posts, they can do so by going to my specific page for my blog posts. (There are not many, but one gal who keeps me posting on a FB page because I just love her!) I ended up getting phone calls from upset family members. I never mention any by name or showed their pictures. BUT. In their minds, I was just “too much,” and very self-absorbed. That’s if they bothered to click the link. I encourage you to separate your FB personality from your blog personality. Feel free to post memes about fibro, people will read and agree or not, plus you’ll find great ones from other FB pages who post about fibro. Families are tough. Chronic is tough to deal with. For this exact reason, we go online and find our own tribe. You have 168 currently! You are going to grow so fast. More importantly, you are sharing fibromyalgia information! Knowledge is power. Use your platforms knowing what will work best! It’s not about ‘them’ but it still stings… I have since decided it is a privilege to be invited into my personal world of fibro, some aren’t welcome. xo~k.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Oh Kim, I’m sorry some of your family feels that way! I did start a separate fb page so that I would not bombard everyone with my posts, but it has had pretty much the same results. Oh well. You are right, chronic is tough to deal with, for us and those who know us. I’m so so thankful for the little tribe I’ve found here. You all are amazing and inspire me. 💜

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I know some of my friends have read a post, but because they do not have a WP account they are not able to like it.

    There is a lovely spirit amongst bloggers, and it’s great to see bloggers encouraging each other. But most bloggers enjoy reading and writing. Many of my friends don’t seem to be interested in blogs.

    Even Goldfinch, there is no way he would read all my posts – no way!! Even though many of them are about how wonderful he is! I don’t think many of my friends would really keep up with my posts (perhaps the occasional glance) but I just don’t think it’s their style to sit down and read my writing. But they leave me in no doubt that they are good friends who love my company and love to chat and have fun. They just don’t want to read my essays/epistles/declarations/dreadful attempts at poetry or the times when I just pour out my heart. Very occasionally someone might comment that I have a nice style and it’s clear I enjoy writing. But blogging is not really their thing.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m sorry to hear that. Keep blogging anyway!
      I was hoping that if my family and friends read my blog, maybe they would have a better understanding of me and/or depression and pain that I deal with daily.

      Like

  6. Hi Jo! Please don’t be disheartened, I’ve been there to and reading the above comments it proves most of us have… Besides my mum, no other family member or friend read my posts but I’ve come to live with it. I’ve made some great connections with others bloggers on WordPress and we support eachother’s writing. & like you said, at the end of the day – the reason we write is because we enjoy it… ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi! Thank you for your encouragement! The support amongst bloggers absolutely blows my mind…I love it. I hope one day your family and friends will read your posts, because they are missing out. Xo

      Liked by 1 person

  7. My dear, as I’m sure you read my posts, they pretty all come from a place of empowering people to not care about what others think. You do what makes you happy as long as you’re not hurting anyone, it’s your stage. Do all the performances that you want.

    Xoxo 😁💛

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Please don’t take it personally. I think part of the reason might be because Facebook itself is kind of a sensory overload… cute baby oh there’s a puppy go to this event like this page read this follow that respond to message THERE’S A PARASAILING DONKEY and sometimes things just get lost? I obviously don’t know the motivations of your own friends and family, but I know that Facebook is pretty overwhelming for me, so I rarely look at it… and I don’t have very many FB friends, either, so I’m sure my feed isn’t as overwhelming as most are.

    Like you said, you write for YOU, and it might sting if someone else doesn’t care to read it (we are all only human, of course it would sting. Especially if you are close to the person) but in the end, it doesn’t really matter. It doesn’t mean that what you had to say was any less valuable or relevant, or that it didn’t help someone else, and who knows, maybe the person would have loved it if they’d only bothered to read it.

    I’m glad that blogging has been a good thing in your life and that you’re going to keep at it. Journaling is important to me also, there’s something about writing things down that just seems to make them a little bit clearer for me.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for your positive words and encouragement! You are right, Facebook can definitely be a sensory overload. The parasailing donkey 😂 oh my goodness!

      Like

  9. My mantra is: always write for yourself first, especially if it helps to free and organize your thoughts and provide any sort of personal therapy. If others connect with and like it, then that’s a bonus. Not everyone will like everything we write and it could be for a number of reasons. As long as you like what you write and it serves your purpose then don’t worry about what others think, or don’t (I know this is much, much harder than it is to simply say it).

    Liked by 1 person

  10. You write beautifully, a much higher level to what I manage. I doubt my blog all the time. Sometimes I write a post which I think is pretty good and yet it doesn’t go down so well. Yet I still get amazed even just one person takes the time to read my rubbish. That one good comment lifts my soul so much. The writing process also helps quell my inner demons. The other thing is that I often have trouble getting WP to accept my comments and likes – somedays it works somedays it doesn’t. xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you! That’s nonsense, you have an amazing blog! I, and I’m sure the rest of your followers, look forward to reading your posts. So many of us parents can relate to your struggles at least on some level. I love the funny events you post about, especially involving the animals. I think you need to set up a camera to capture these things. I have that trouble too with WordPress, but I do most everything on here from the app. Not sure if that makes a difference. If writing helps keep those inner demons quiet, that’s the most important thing. Keep up the great writing! Oh yeah, aren’t you two about due for another round of jellybean roulette? We’re all waiting to see what lovely flavor you get to enjoy next. ♡

      Like

      1. Sounds interesting! My son wants to do a ‘try not to laugh challenge’ and if you do laugh, you have to keep a super sour candy in your mouth.

        Like

  11. When I started blogging in 2013, I shared almost all of my posts on Facebook and received likes and comments from random people I hadn’t talked to in years saying they enjoyed my blog. It was really cool. Over time, I felt like my constant posting of my blog became “too much” and I started telling myself people didn’t care anymore because the clicks and likes went down. It got to the point where I didn’t share my blog on Facebook anymore. I got in my own head. I think I’ve since realized that most people just go on Facebook to scroll throughout the day and don’t want to click away to read something longer – I know I would never click on links to read articles. Maybe it’s just that. It’s not that they don’t care, it’s just they don’t feel like doing more than scrolling which is kinda sad but is understandable in this day and age.

    So don’t be discouraged! I’ve always thought that bloggers are the best support system anyway, because non-bloggers don’t understand why we do this in the first place.

    Side Note: I noticed while clicking on your blog via my notifications that there is a typo in your Web Address link and leads to a dead end page. To fix that, you can go to your Profile > Account Settings > Edit Web Address. Hope that helps!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for the encouragement, Paul! Sadly it seems that yes, unless you’re posting a meme or a picture of your “amazing” life, people just keep scrolling.
      Definitely love the blogging community. I’ve never encountered such a supportive group of people before.
      Thank you for letting me know! Grr, this will be the second time I’ve had to correct this issue. I appreciate the help!

      Liked by 1 person

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