Back Pain: My Frenemy

I hope this weekend is treating you well.

Low Back Pain and I met sometime around 2008. From then until sometime in 2017, we had many adventures together. We accompanied each other to get-togethers with doctors, we attended multiple physical therapy sessions together and we even took pictures together in those fun photo booths (mri and ct) on several occasions. The more time we spent together though, I felt the need to escape my new friend. I tried to declare my need for independence, but Back Pain insisted on sticking around. Now, she had already made daily responsibilities difficult, and insisted that I not work anymore (she had help with this from Fibromyalgia) and I was becoming more and more fed up with her company. We sought counseling at a surgeon’s office once in 2016, but the surgeon took her side and said I was stuck with her; there was nothing she could do for us. Over the next year, Back Pain and I continued on as we had before. We took more photos together, but I was in tears as she smiled. We finally got another counseling appt with a different surgeon in 2017, and I thought, this is it…freedom. Only, our insurance wasn’t accepted, so we left with me in tears and frustration and Back Pain just laughing. A few weeks later, we tried again with a new surgeon and guess what?! He took my side! He was going to free me of my unwanted friend, or at least make us long distance friends.

I had my first surgery July 2017, an ALIF (anterior lumbar interbody fusion). Things were going well for a while but I ended up with a new pain from si (sacroilliac) joint dysfunction. Almost one year to date, I had a second surgery to fuse the si joint on the right side.

I am scheduled to have the left side fused this Monday morning. I’ve never been so excited for a Monday! I’m hoping that this third and hopefully last surgery will be the end to my friendship with Back Pain.

With love, J♡

10 thoughts on “Back Pain: My Frenemy

  1. Dear J♡, I truly hope you are able to shake this frenemy for good this time. There’s nothing harder than watching your own child in pain and knowing there’s only one thing you can do -pray. Love, Mom

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Emma, I’m so sorry you have to suffer with that pain! I pray that you will find a doctor who will see beyond the chart information and find a way to help you. I know it feels like the pain can slowly drain you of the person you were/want to be. May God ease your pain.

      Gentle hugs, J♡

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Meena.💛
      Unfortunately the pain is still very much alive, and I am now exploring the possibility of another surgery.
      Thank you for leaving a link to your blog; I will definitely check it out! Take care.


  2. While you are looking at more back surgery options you might also want to get hold of a book (the local library should have it, or could get a copy for you) by Dr Norman Doidge called “The Brain’s Way Of Healing”. Chapter 1 deals with severe chronic back pain. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

      1. You are most welcome – i hope it can work for you! 🙂

        It’s not so much a cure for what is causing the illness but rather the brain learning how to reduce/eliminate the pain it lets you feel from it and so letting you return to a more ‘normal’ life that your body can handle.

        Liked by 1 person

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